Inspired by :: The Truth

I was inspired by this post from Laverne yesterday. It’s part of a larger weekly blog meme hosted by Just Be Enough, and this week’s theme is “The Truth”.

I’ve had a truth sitting inside me for months now (and this post has been saved as a draft for weeks). This truth has been waiting for me to acknowledge it, to be honest about it, and to accept it. And sometime between feeling that truth first appear and reading the Just Be Enough posts, something clicked and I found my moxie. It’s time to share my truth. You ready? Deep breath.

My truth is that jewelry is no longer working for me, and Catie’s Blue is coming to an end.

I don’t know if it’s forever, but I do know it’s for now.

Seeing that typed out isn’t comfortable for me. There were a lot of reasons I don’t want to let go – like my fear of change, or the fact that I’ve defined myself as a jewelry designer for four and a half years. I put my heart and soul into growing a business, and I sacrificed for it (gladly, and without regret). I’ve held on because I have no idea what to do next, job-wise, and that’s terrifying. And yeah, having to tell friends and family and buyers and supporters that I was done is hard, and I wanted to avoid it.

But the biggest reason to let go is that it’s flat out not working, and it hasn’t been working for quite a while. I gave myself time to find the spark again, to wait for the muse to speak or the passion to reignite. But in that space, my truth didn’t change; if anything, it got stronger and more insistent.

I’ve done what I’ve wanted to do with jewelry, and it’s served its purpose for me.

That’s all the reason I need, and I’ve dug up the courage to accept it, but maybe you need more of an explanation. I totally understand; for some of us, we’ve walked this path together for years. So, here it is.

I want to stop going through the motions. I want to feel lit up again. I want to get up and be excited to do what I do again. I want to lose myself in the artistic flow again.

(I used big letters so you’d get how badly I want that to happen.)

I see jewelry friends who create amazing pieces of wearable art, who do it because they want to, because they love it, because they are driven to do it, and I am truly, genuinely happy for them. I want to support my jewelry friends, and will continue to do so (they are awesome, incredibly talented people). But I’m not a jewelry designer anymore. Jewelry is no longer my driving passion, but I want to find what is.

I’ve reflected on it more than you could possibly know, and for longer than I let on. So, while this might be a surprise to you, this has been a long time coming. And fears aside, my decision isn’t coming from a place of anxiety or depression; it’s coming from that place inside that tells you what’s good for you. It feels scary, but right.

So, I’m letting go, and hoping that by letting go of what was, I’ll be able to make room for what might be.

And in acknowledging that one truth, another pops up – I am relieved. Deep down inside, I am relieved.

“Yes, success is gritty business and you’ve got to hustle your bustle. You’ve got to eat intensity Wheaties for breakfast. But there’s a difference between happy rigor and inane slogging. Slogging doesn’t work. It just doesn’t. You can’t plant misery seeds today and expect to get a juicy crop next season.”

 

-Danielle La Porte, The Spark Kit

There are still details to finalize, and I haven’t figured them all out yet. I can tell you that Catie’s Blue will most likely close late November, early December. My blog will still be here. Freshly Hued will still be here. Beyond that? Not sure.

Wish me luck?

 

24 Responses to Inspired by :: The Truth

  1. May serendipity take you were your heart will beat fast & you’ll light up like a Christmas tree from excitement. May all your dreams come true, even if you’re not sure what that next dream is yet. It will find a way to you.

  2. I am a bit sad to hear this. You make such beautiful jewelry, Brandi.
    But, I understand completely and you must do what you feel is right.
    You are full of such great ideas and you are such a good person.
    I know you will do amazing things, no matter the field.

    I wish you the very, very best, my friend!!

  3. That you know what isn’t working for you, acknowledging it and letting it go – it’s a brave, brave thing to do.

    Life is too short to live with regrets – do what feels right. Good luck!

    Thank you for linking up to JBE!

  4. I haven’t seen any jewelry posts in a while so I was wondering what was up. I know this was a tough decision and one that you did not make lightly. It is very scary trying to figure out what to do next. But I do like what you said about making room for what’s to come by letting go of what isn’t working.

    You’ve been a big help to me re photography and pricing tips. I’m grateful for your generosity with sharing what you know with us. I hope there’s something with blogging, photography, and writing in your future. Maybe adding advertising to bring in some money. And just expand on what you’ve been doing here. Tip share and business information for artists, artisans, and crafters.

    I know you’ll figure it out. You have so many strengths to draw from. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. And I’ll still be here checking in with you.

    Cyndi

  5. While I find this sad, I also see the need for you to be happy. And if jewelry wasn’t doing it for you anymore, then you’re doing the right thing. May you find something that lights your spark the way jewelry once did.

    You are an amazingly talented woman in so many ways — I’m certain you will land on your feet and your heart will sing.

    V

    ** If I know you, you’re probably most of the way there already.

  6. I don’t see this as sad at all. For I believe that every ending is the start of something else. And I know that you have been seeking your true purpose, Miss Brandi. Letting go of this thing allows you to open your heart to something new. And I know that whatever that something is, you will do it with class and vibrancy and life. And it will be color-full and filled with joy. That is who you are.

    You know where I am if you need a springboard, a shoulder, a little laughter or to share a tear and someone to share to raise a glass, hold your hand or give you a kick in the tookus, right?

    I am that for you.

    “Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.”

    This is a something good. I just know it. Embrace it and forge that new path. We will be here rooting for you.

    Enjoy the day.
    Erin

  7. Add me to the list rooting for you! I just wrote about this same thing… I already have experienced new opportunities coming into my life because I’ve made room for them by letting go of other things that just aren’t me anymore and I’m sure you’ll have that same experience.

  8. I understand. I went through this same thing with my jewelry. It was difficult to set it aside and explore something new and unknown. I’m glad I did it. Enjoy your journey.

  9. I just started following you because I followed one of the links on Erin Praise-Hintz’s blog posts. I think it’s incredibly brave to write a post like this. Art should be a compulsion and unstoppable. If you’ve lost that spark in jewelry, you’ll find it somewhere. I’m looking forward to where your journey leads you! I, on the other hand, am just starting down this path. I’ve been dabbling as a hobby business and am enjoying the break from the stress of corporate life. I don’t want to go back!

    Anyway, best wishes for your next journey!

  10. I’m happy for you for making a leap and taking the road that’s right for you. As you know, I’m still struggling with what I want to do in the near future. Your example may be the catalyst I need!

  11. Thank you for popping into my little piece of the blogosphere and commenting. I am glad my poem resonated with you and that it was helpful to you :)

    I think you are very brave to admit that you need a new challenge and are willing to risk finding your new passion.

    Best of luck with it and I am sure you will succeed… you’ve done the hard part already!

  12. Wow. What a brave thing to do. It’s very easy to get trapped by the things we have allowed to define us – because, as you say, if I’m not a _____________ (insert definition here), what am I? For me, there was a huge moment when my daughter moved out – if I wasn’t being her mom, every day, in an intense emotional way, who the heck was I?? So hat’s off to you – and I’ll be praying for vision and wisdom for you.

    Blessings -

    Francesca

  13. I love this! I would say it’s not something you should be embarrassed to admit, but I won’t tell you how to feel. I do understand though. I’ve lost my spark for a job I used to love, so on Friday I quit. We’re going to move to another city and I’m not exactly sure what I’m going to do, but I feel lit up by the prospect.

    Good for you, and so glad you linked up with us on Just.Be.Enough!

  14. It sounds like this change will make you happier. And doing what makes you happy, whether it’s what you’ve envisioned for yourself, or not, is going to make you feel more fulfilled and satisfied with life.

    Good luck on whatever path your heart takes you.

  15. Brandi,
    I am just catching up on your blog – so sorry I’ve been away for a few days. I’m not surprised to hear your news at all… I could see your spark was elsewhere and I think you are truly on the path to finding it (or maybe already have!). It is hard to admit something like this, something that has defined you. I like how you state that although it isn’t working now, it doesn’t mean that you’ll never do it again either. I like that attitude – we are free to change back and forth to be and do whatever feels right and “works” as you mentioned! :-)
    And the comment that was left about life being short – I wholeheartedly agree. I know I’m guilty oftentimes of going through the motions. But it doesn’t take long before it is clear if something feels right or not. And that’s when I say to move on because yes, life is short and we all need to make the most of it!
    I’m excited for you now that the path is clear and you are more free than ever to pursue your new dreams. I can’t wait to see where they take you and will be here along the way!

  16. friend, let me just say i am SOOOO proud of you!!! i know this has been coming for a while. good for you for stepping out. i know you will find what is next and it will be so much more amazing than you ever imagined. love you and know that i am here for you.

    hugs!!!!

    wendy

  17. Wow. First, hats off to you. It takes courage to step away from something, and wisdom to know when it’s time to do that.

    Second, I hope you find what makes you happy now. You’re so right, sometimes the same thing only makes us happy for so long. It serves its purpose, then it’s time for us to move on. I know you’ll find that special something.

    Last – you’ve inspired me, so thank you.

    Thanks for linking up to JBE! :)

  18. Brandi, I understand how you feel and this sounds like an exciting (even though it’s scary) new direction for you. You’ll find what you love. And while I’ll miss seeing your beautiful jewelry, I’m sure whatever you do next will be just as fabulous! Best wishes to you!

  19. I don’t know you, but I am proud of you anyway. It is hard to walk away from something that you poured your heart into, but sometimes it is the right decision. Sometimes that is the only way new things can enter. They need room. Seedlings kept in the dark, need space and light to flourish.

    I truly wish you the best and look forward to reading more about where your journey leads.

Leave a reply

  Am Not Spammer

CommentLuv badge

There are no icons to display.